Pals
The American people tend to get tired of listening to most presidents after two terms, and by then they are usually itching to throw the incumbent party out of the White House and give the other team a chance. Barack Obama has not succeeded in pulling America out of the recession which began with the housing crash in 2008, and he has not endeared himself. He has really just polarized and embittered the country by his arrogant left-wing partisanship.
So it doesn’t take a crystal ball to know that in 2016 Fate favors the Republican presidential nominee. On top of all that, the democrat party bench is extraordinarily short of candidates. They have the dark horse (not even actually a democrat until very recently) Hippie socialist from Vermont, Bernie Sanders, every American’s crazy Jewish communist uncle. And they have Hillary.
Barack Obama was Fortune’s gift to the democrat party: attractive; well-spoken with a good vocabulary and a pleasing announcer’s voice; well-mannered and skilled at delivering the impression of calm, reasonability, and moderation; and, best of all, black and not merely black, but black laundered and pressed into the most excellent Ivy League form by Columbia and Harvard. All the king’s horses and all the king’s men couldn’t save the 2008 election for poor elderly John McCain. He found himself running with a stock market crash, hanging like an albatross around his own and his party’s neck, and against the Flavor-of-the-Month, a shiny new Pop Culture sensation roughly as popular in 2008 as the Beatles in 1964.
Hillary Clinton in 2016 is obviously completely different from Barack Obama in 2008. Obama entered the campaign surrounded by imaginary butterflies and unicorns. Hillary enters on her broom, accompanied by flying monkeys. Barack Obama was so lovable that every adolescent girl in America, male and female, young and old, had a crush on him. NBC’s Chris Matthews famously found his leg trembling with nearly homoerotic adoration of Obama. Nobody’s leg will be quivering for the old and wrinkly Hillary.
Obama was the Magic Negro, the wise friend from another race whose acceptance of you proves that you are exceptionally worthy, and whose aid brings about your survival or your victory in your quest. Hillary is every man’s shrewish wife, the pot-throwing termagant who drives all of America out to the nearest saloon to drown our collective sorrows. Hillary is the mean old lady, heading up the Ladies’ League For Social Reform that is going to ban everything that’s fun. Obama was Chingachgook, Queequeg, and a younger version of every Morgan Freeman character. Hillary is Lady Macbeth.
It would take a miracle effectuated by a political genius of the first water to make Hillary electable, especially in this unfavorable year. The Republican presidential nominee in 2016 has the key to the Oval Office in his pocket as long as he is normally presentable and can walk and talk.
Maybe Hillary can win after all, though, because it just so happens that she is married to a political genius of the first water.
William Jefferson Clinton is another living, breathing all-American archetype. He is Herman Melville’s Confidence Man. He is Sam Slick, old-time vendor of wooden nutmegs and clay coffee beans. He is the prototypical travelling salesman, moving happily from this small-town general store to the next, vacuum-cleaner under one arm, a smile for everyone on his lips and a smutty story all ready to amuse the boys sitting round the pot-bellied stove.
Only a political genius could have seduced a 21-year-old intern in the Oval Office, wagged his finger in the face of America and lied about it, and then gotten the American people upset with Congress for impeaching him. The Clintons have merrily lied, cheated, sexually-pecadilloed, and stolen their way for decades all the way from Arkansas to Washington, and their adversaries simply wind up deceased or humiliated with Clintonian tire tracks right over them.
So I asked myself, if I were Bill, how on earth could I possibly cause the unamiable, unattractive, scandal-infested, mean old Hillary to win in this most unfavorable year?
Well, what if… what if that slick old Bill actually did think up a way? How could he do it? Well, there is one way, after all. Just suppose it was possible for Bill Clinton to hijack the GOP nomination.
Suppose Bill Clinton figured out the sole, solitary possible way that he could shove a big, fat monkey wrench into the Republican Party’s Presidential Election Campaign’s works.
Let’s say, for instance, that Old Bill knew another feller, that he had a buddy, a good friend, not in politics actually, but a fellow in some respects kind of like himself, brash, shameless, fond of the ladies, appetitive, hugely out-going, and larger-than-life. Bill’s friend, like himself, would be a wealthy and successful person, a celebrity, a performer, and a chap vigorously able to go after what he wants free of ethical inhibitions.
One can picture Bill sitting down with his pal Donald, and saying, “Donald, old boy, I need you to do Hillary and me a solid. The good news is that the whole thing is going to be one of the greatest larks of all time, and together we are going to make history. This is really going to be a hoot! If it works, you get all the billions of dollars of federal contracts, leases, and subsidies you can use, and Hillary will appoint you ambassador to the Court of St. James. If it fails, sheeeit! you get to be president. This is a no-lose operation.”
And then Bill (behind the scenes) masterminds The Donald’s campaign, knocking out one legitimate GOP candidate after another with shameless insults, abuse, and outright baldfaced lies.
Donald gets the nomination, but it could be that Bill has a plan in mind to sink the Trump campaign right about the end of next September. Photographs of Donald (like Berlusconi) in the sack with some underage girls just happen to fall into the hands of intrepid NY Times reporters in the nick of time. The GOP campaign sinks suddenly in scandal, while Donald smiles over the stories of his sexual prowess, and Hillary coasts in after all.
What if?
DirtyJobsGuy
Plausible as anything else. If the best that they could play against Mitt Romney was that he paid low tax rates, there must be boxes and boxes of stuff on the Donald. All it takes is some organization willing to use it. The Democrats will have no regrets.
It will be something with women I think. Something that drives female support for Hillary to the 70% range.
Harpo Marx
Old Bill forgot something about Trump. I think that we can agree that “The Donald” is an egotistical man. As such he sees that he can get the prize for himself. Just as Hillary reaches out to get it, The Donald snatches it for himself.
Boligat
I have long held a sneaking suspicion that the Dems are pulling an “Akins” (re: McCaskill/Akins in MO) on the Repubs.
The thing I don’t understand is how in the world the rest of the Repub candidates can’t get it though their heads that Trump is having so much success because he attacks, because he is fearless, because he is saying some things that everyone knows are true, but for some inexplicable reason won’t say themselves. No need to be coarse or vulgar about it, just speak up!
If the Repubs don’t get their act together the entire country will get a far meaner, uglier, crookeder and stupider version of McCaskill. I’m from Missouri and I’m just sayin’….
Cruz, Rubio, Kasich and Carson should get together and admit that as things are going right now, Trump is going to win the nomination unless they ALL agree to pull out of the campaign and throw their weight behind another candidate, maybe Perry? But one that can win. After all, so far, more people are voting for someone other than Trump. Make it a two person race and make sure the drafted candidate is fearless and willing and eligible. Clear away all the “what about’s” like eligibility for Cruz and Rubio, kookiness for Carson, establishment for Rubio & Kasich, etc. And NOT some retread like Romney or McCain.
But it won’t happen because that would require that all the candidates put aside their own egos and do what is right for the country.
MMinLamesa
OH NOES!!!!! Trump caught in bed with underage girls!!!!
First, if the first hand accounts of Obama and his various escapades ala Man’s Country failed to do a damn thing with REgressives, why do you think Trump’s support would melt away?
Second, you Trump haters, grasping for anything, apparently really believe that a penchant for young ladies is going to negate his pledges to build a wall, deport the illegals and stop the moslom invasion.
IOW, who cares?
Hell, I just read today the GOPe is going to go full Mississippi on trump in the general. IT WON’T MATTER.
Jeb! just burned through $120 MILLION attacking Trump and Trump is now pushing there magic 50% nationally-with 5 other Rs hanging around.
You guys just do not get it.
MM
Cactusjack
This is not a far fetched scenario at all. It’s right out of the LBJ play book and I’m sure the Clintons have updated that to better fit their even more rapacious natures. And it won’t take a bimbo incident to sink Trumps campaign if he’s nominated–that’s a little too uncomfortable for Bill. They’ll just leak the story that he’s been stalking for Hillary all along and he’s toast. Wouldn’t be surprised if some of her deleted “personal” emails allude to this strategy. Her election–if it happens–will be the irreversible turning point in the demise of our Republic.
D S Craft
I’ve been saying to my my family for several months that Trump and the Clintons are in this together and the whole reason Trump got in the race was to destroy the Republican field by sucking all the oxygen out of the room and taking up all the media time with his bombast and hucksterism. If he isn’t trying to do that he sure as done a good job anyway. How many governors has he blasted out because they couldn’t get any traction with him around? Meanwhile, he’s going around the country telling the rubes exactly what he knows they want to hear and they are eating it up. Remember, as a businessman it’s all about making the pitch and he’s really good at it. Also, remember that telephone call he had with Bill Clinton just before he entered the race. Was that Bill asking him to please reconsider or were they going over some last minute planning? I think the Clintons wanted a little extra insurance this go round because Hillary’s such a weak candidate so Bill, that wiley wascal, called on his good friend Donald for a little help.
R Daneel
What do you see in that picture?
I see $100M millionaires sucking up to $10B billionaire. Trump can buy them 100 times over.
I also see three self-styled members of ‘The Elite’. Self branded ‘movers and shakers’.
So, think any of them have your best interests at heart?
Me neither.
R Daneel
Posted at American Digest Sidelines:
Bull.
Trump supporters are just average Americans who are angrier than they can express. The critical presidential election is not this one, but the one back in 2012, where Romney got robbed—that was the one we had to win. We had a chance to stop the bleeding, and we lost it. Now the left has had four more years to nail the windows shut, and we are running out of air.
It’s a white-hot anger: molten, incandescent—biblical. I’ll bet most of them would pay to stand in line for an opportunity to hold Trump’s jacket while he slaughters the establishment’s sacred cows. Go ahead, destroy the Republican Party; it’s rotten to the foundations. And set fire to the Democrats while you’re at it. Tear the whole damned thing down, and start over.
Strike fear into these mothers’ hearts. Make them groan. Make them wail and gnash their teeth and tear their clothes. Great. What can we do to help?
His supporters realize that Trump presents problems, but they don’t give a damn. For years, the American public has been bled white, lied to, cheated, humiliated, manipulated, and kicked in the teeth. Over the last 30 years, their freedom, their laws, their rights, and their culture has been stolen from them.
They’re staring into a future in which their kids will be illiterate or second-class citizens or both, and may never be able to get a decent job, own their own home, enjoy any of the simple liberties we grew up with, or have a happy family.
And to top it off, they’re filled with nightmares of their children and grandchildren reduced to eating the grass on the lawn, or being blown to bits while walking down the street.
Trump’s campaign is where America is turning to clean house while clinging to vestiges of civilized behavior. It represents an opportunity for renewal on many levels. If it doesn’t work, I fear America is in for much worse than it has already seen.
Posted by: ahem at February 23, 2016 8:51 PM
Richard Ong
D.S. Craft, they couldn’t get any traction period.
SDD
Trump is really into conspiracy theories. He stuck with the Birther line for years. He offered that Scalia had been murdered. had Suggested that Cruz’ father was involved with the JFK assassination. Maybe he wanted to actually pull off a real one.
Scullman
The day after the first non politician in U.S. history wins the nomination of a major political party….and this is the crap you come up with?
Sad.
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